Do you think Im wrong?

No you are not wrong. Its their choice to be this way. I'm sure they are aware that If they want to be part of your life they have to change. the way they sound, I don't think that even if you did try to get along with them it would make much of a diffrence. Chances are they would just twist your kindness and stab you in the back. It would add stress to your marriage and hurt your relationship with your husband. You are doing the right thing